So… this will be simple. Sherri – it’s fantastic you lost 41 pounds. That’s no small feat, but you’re not hot. There’s much work to be done and even then you won’t be hot. It just isn’t happening. If a killer whale is 7000 pounds and loses 150, it’s a step in the right direction, but come on – it’s still a fat ass killer whale you know? And just because that Lane Bryant, relaxed fit pant reads “Size 6″ doesn’t make it a reality.
“What’s with tats on t*ts? It’s not sexy or hot. It looks awful and the chicks that do it are never the hot ones? Megan Fox ain’t got no tats on her t*ts.”
Okay then…
every body settle down.
1. Not sure if you’re a chick or a dude – that would give me a different slant on the reply. Tracy is a girl’s name to me, so therefore I’ve decided you’re a sexy, raven haired, lesbian bartender. You work it at a local strip joint, but feel a sense of pride that you have stooped to actually working the pole. You’re better than that.
2. Language – moratorium on the word “ain’t” here at youmaywantto.com and double moratorium on the word “tits”.
I disagree that they are never hot. Teri Polo, Eve (pictured) and Christina Ricci have tattoos on their breasts and overall they are fairly acceptable visually. I’m not quite sure why seemingly attractive women feel the need to ruin their bodies. Nothing permanently painted in that region is making you look any better. Why not just slap one on your neck or face while you’re at it? The female body is a piece of artwork in itself. Is God’s work not good enough? That must be it. Women who get breast tattoos are spitting in the face of God. They may as well be terrorists.
Admittedly, I didn’t receive an email from Governor Sanford’s better half, asking my advice, but I’m going to throw her a bone and give my opinion on the whole thing anyway.
A question to ask yourself – Did you really do everything you could to prevent this? I mean how many rolls in the hay a week are we talking? Anything less than 3 and I can see how he rolled out…
Your husband wrote this to his hot Latina mistress – “I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night’s light — but hey, that would be going into sexual details …” Is it just me or does he sound like a hopeless romantic? Frankly, I might date him at this point.
I don’t think anyone is buying that you didn’t know he’d fleed internationally and was not seeking new species of brown spiders along the Appalachian Trail.
Kudos to you for letting him stand alone at the blow-out press conference, but do us all a favor and simply divorce. No one wants to see you holding hands at a future conference, explaining how you’ll survive this and come out stronger. It’s not true and we aren’t buying it.
I am not without sympathy – as a matter of fact, I cannot think of anything more horrifying than a plane breaking up, mid flight, in the dead of dark. Honestly, what would be worse than that?
Having said that, why in the hell is Jacques Cousteau hanging out in the wreckage in just a thong? The other recovery crew are in some sort of safety gear and this jerk is just chilling in a banana hammock. Have some honor for the dead Sir!!
I remember being 6 years old, all dolled up in my Spring dress to take a class picture. I climbed the oddly large white stool and the photographer instructed me to put one of my feet up on the stool’s rung. Instead of the bottom rung I hoisted my leg up to the top. The photographer said something to the affect of … “Whoa. Not that high sweetie.”
So I was 6 when I learned not to flash my vagina at a camera – and at least I was wearing panties. Apparently ladies at Sickles High School are still awaiting the memo.
A Sickles High School yearbook photois making news today after a 16 year old student says she didn’t wear panties to school the day the photos were taken because she didn’t want panty lines showing up in her yearbook photos. However, the end result of going commando has meant an eyeful for thousands who have copies of the Sickles High School yearbook.
So now there are 2500 of these things floating around and not surprisingly, the girl’s parents are freaking out. Also not surprising, their freaking out energy is pointed towards the school.
A few things we know: Teenage girls crave attention. This isn’t always achieved in the healthiest of ways. Teenage girls make insanely stupid decisions. Teenage girls often regret those decision and can switch on the sweet and innocent in .3 seconds.
She left the house without panties because she didn’t want pantylines? Has she ever heard of a thong? And the fact of the matter is, a girl learns to close her legs tightly or cross them when she’s a child, so the combination of no panties + legs spread open doesn’t read as an accident to me. I have no doubt she’s horribly embarrassed now… as she should be. If she were my kid our next trip would be to JC Penney’s, where we would procede to buy the biggest, whitest, granny panties ever made. Granny and a stapler to keep them on. Tanlines wouldn’t be a concern.
I know a go to for older people is to complain about younger people and I know people without kids love to tell parents how to raise their kids… granted.
But when did kids become so sensitive? Maybe I should ask when we decided they were so fragile and sensitive?
There are children who have a deep sense of entitlement and view that everything should go their way simply because. It shouldn’t take effort, struggle or investment. This is because we have created that world for them. An overly protective snowglobe to live in where they can be sheltered from failure, sadness or shame.
Kid gets a D on their exam? Blame the teacher. They should’ve worked harder with your child. Don’t they know how special he is? Never mind that you haven’t gotten home earlier than 8pm since the kid was in diapers and you’ve never glanced at their homework.
Kid isn’t very good at soccer? Change the rules, so the kids that are good can’t shine as much. Don’t take score. Give everyone the same trophy and recognition at the end of the season, rather you sit and play with grass or guard the goal with attitude like a 9 year old Navy Seal. That’s the fair thing to do right? Everyone will be equal.
When we shield kids from bad experiences it must stunt their growth and we’re setting them up for even more traumatic failure later in life. What motivations are they left with? When you do badly you’re suppose to feel badly. That sadness motivates you to be better. To work harder. Run faster. Be better. Competition isn’t a four letter world. As a matter of fact, they better get use to it and grow a thicker hide, because college and the real world will kick their asses. The Dean of Admissions at Stanford doesn’t care about your feelings and neither will your first boss.
None of this is to say every parent raises a child this way – most clearly do not. The other side of the spectrum are the hideous people who push their kids too far. But that’s an entirely different rant.
The picture comes from TheInsider.com and I believe it is Heidi Klum with her brood. Clearly the kid is having a whiny moment, but two things jump out at me. 1. That the baby in the stroller is brown – you know, because the kids are brown and I’m brown, so you gotta like that and 2. That the little boy is pushing a baby stroller and something has upset him… hopefully it’s that he figured out he’s pushing a baby stroller.
The last time I read a story on it, Facebook had somewhere in the area of 175 million users.
I came across a story today about their desire to raise revenue by offering vanity URLs. Scroll down to the comments section and you’ll notice people already have plenty of complaints, reasons this isn’t necessary, reasons it won’t work or how you could just get around it.
I (heart) America most of the time. I’ve been privileged to travel about the world and having seen a decent amount out there… I view myself as having won the birth lottery when I happened to pop out of a vagina in the good ol’ US of A. But there’s a disturbing sense of entitlement here.
They change the interface some and people bitch. Whispers even begin to grow around a user-fee and people are jumping out of windows. Less people protest the Iraq war. I didn’t personally agree with the proposed changes to the terms of use a while ago, but I understood that I clearly would have a choice in what I uploaded and did not. Again, Facebook is a FREE service and you can walk away anytime you like. The last time I checked there is nothing listed in the glorious Bill of Rights covering social networking.
So why is it so wrong for Facebook to make more money? That’s an honest question I have.
A college kid comes up with an idea that just happens to revolutionize the way we connect with friends, family, co-workes, neighbors, anyone on a daily… HOURLY… basis. How we share our lives with one another. Our likes, dislikes, opinions our freaking hopes and dreams and many people aren’t willing to kick a dime his way. By no means am I crying a river for Zuckerberg. Estimated revenue last year was in the 300 mil range. But that’s $1.75/year a user. That doesn’t sound right…
I won’t even pretend to understand the realm enough to grasp it, but I have to think the infrastructure necessary to store the “Which Godfather Character Are You” quizzes and English Bulldogs in funny hats pictures alone must be mind boggling.
It seems their biggest revenue stream at this point would be the ads. I’ve used them for work myself and they are extremely easy to create, highly targeted and inexpensive. It’s a decent way to make a buck, but how many of the 175 million users have ever used them?
And speaking of businesses, how many of them have set-up totally free fan pages and reaped the benefits of creating an online community for their customers? It provides an instant connection, access and interactive ability that previously didn’t exist. Being in marketing I can’t stress enough what an amazing tool it is.
I don’t think the longterm “hotness” of any social media site can be assured. To quote the immortal Biggie Smalls – “A true motherfucker going out for the loot”. They have to get the revenue while they can, because the public is fickle. There’s always going to be something more interesting around the corner.
Over the past 16 years it’s been an incredible ride.
Changing the face of the game forever as you used the Mickey Mouse Club to exhibit everything from stylin’ dance moves the likes of which we’d never seen to comedic timing that would put George Carlin to shame.The versatility was absurd.
But MMC was like a shooting star. It’s flame so hot and beautiful it simply wasn’t meant to last.
No worries. It was just an appetizer to the real meal. That’s right. I’m talking N fucking Sync!
Poised for super stardom, you showed your charitable nature by bringing along your dimwitted, virtually talentless co-star, JC Chasez. You kept it real by letting one of your homies ride and for that you gained respect.
Words can never express…
N’Sync delighted with 3 albums. The final bringing us the groundbreaking Girlfriend remix with Nelly. It gave us a taste… a suggestion… of things to come. More than ever you outshined your counterparts and your mind seemed to wonder. Coupled with rave reviews for your outstanding work in the Disney Channel epic, Model Behavior, the call to work solo seemed too much to resist.
So again you left us. Briefly.
We soon learned it was all for the best. In fact, you could say it was… Justified!
Timberlake, Neptunes, Timbaland. Or TNT as I like to call you. It formed a holy trinity of sorts. And what you created was indeed good.
Ain’t nobody love you like I love you. So true. You rocked our bodies and we all cried a river for you over Britney’s whorin’. In hindsight you clearly won that battle.
Being the ultimate performer, the ultimate tease, it was another 4 years before a full Justin album would hit stores.
When you returned, you returned a MAN.
None of us were truly prepared for FutureSex/LoveSounds. How could you be? How can anyone prepare for a force of nature?
I’d remark more, but I’ve never actually gotten all the way through the album without passing out during Sexy Ladies and waking up hours later, drenched in sweat and panties torn to shreds.
That was 2 ½ years ago.
This is where the tone of this letter must sadly turn.
No one cares about…
- Madonna
- The Love Guru
- Any MTV reality series
- Golf
- Saturday Night Live post ‘92
- The dick in a box joke resulting from the aforementioned horrible show
Having said all that, your fans remain ever loyal. But take heed Timberlake. We won’t wait forever. Matt Giraud is coming on strong pal!
Now get your pretty little ass back in the recording booth and don’t you dare bring T-Pain with you.
PS – I realize you’ve been dating Jessica to make me jealous. It’s just getting silly. She’s a sweet girl and I hate to see her used this way. Break it off.
Okay then…
As soon as I saw the headline on msnbc, 
The last time I read a story on it, Facebook had somewhere in the area of 175 million users.